The same post but this time translated for my inner city peeps, courtesy of the ebonics translator....
I’ve come ta da conclusion dat da Swiss peeps gots uh bettah appreciation o' tyme than da rest o' da world. No doubt da sheer number o' clocks dey iz surrounded by on uh daily basis plays uh part in dis here, but it mus' be mo'. The world here seems ta move at its own pace. Not necessarily slower cuz procrastination an' running late don’t seem ta be traits o' da peeps here, just steadier. If you’re rollin' in da country an' dere iz traffic fo' nahh logical reason (like uh cow in da road, or uh tractor broken down..which I see on uh nearly daily basis), da smart money would be on da fact dat uh Swiss driver iz at da head o' da line. It’s almost as o' da peeps here expect brothas else ta run by they schedules, dey do make all da watches afta all.
I’ve found it ta be uh rather nice change. I wasn’t typically late fo' things 'bfoe, but I wuz known ta miss uh flight or two, an' muh ma fuckin rollin' has definitely slowed down uh bit. Perhaps da 55hp `64 an' speeding tickets play uh part in dat though. Of course predictability can be pimp-tight an' bad but thus far da clockwork Swiss lifestyle has been fine ass decent. I don’t wear uh watch, which over here iz comparable ta walking around naked. But really what’s da point, between computers, cell phones, iPods it’s uh redundant piece o' equipment. However despite da predictable, clockwork like lifestyle tyme still seems ta be speeding up. Possibly even exponentially but I wont bore anyone wiff dat nerdy theory.
Next Wednesday marks 1 year living overseas. I can’t believe it, muh ma fuckin colleagues an' niggas can’t believe it, muh ma fuckin wallet doesn’t believe it…but despite logic seeming ta say otherwise, da calendar doesn’t lie. Hell, it wuz only last month dat I graduated from high skoo, last week I finished college an' only yesterday dat I moved over here wasn’t it? It’s incredible fo' me ta th'o't dat it wuz actually nearly 10 years ago dat I finished high skoo, nearly 6 years ago dat I finished college an' as o' next Wed, 1 year since I moved over here. Where da hell do da tyme jet!
I started here uh year ago wiff uh laundry list o' expectations, things ta do, places ta see, niggas ta make, ho's ta date, cars ta gank etc. As ya can prob'ly imagine reality wuz much different, not pimp-tight or bad, just different. Over da past year I’ve done an' seen quite allot an' despite da ups an' downs da overall experience has definitely been well worth it. I wuz so miserable at muh ma fuckin job 'bfoe leaving dat I truly can’t imagine what I’d be doin' now if I hadn’t jumped ship from Detroit. My position here iz has been great so far, I actually feel like I contribute somethin' ta da organization, afta all filling da ketchup dispensers iz an important job! I’ve even got uh few other companies here dat gots asked me ta consider changing jobs.
I almost hate ta admit it but dere wuz some days while working back in Detroit dat I would jet at noon..just take muh ma fuckin cellphone an' jet home, jet ta da bar, jet hang out at da pool (thanks kovax’s’s’s), lunch on 8 mile, jet cruize muh ma fuckin cars…anything but werk. What made it worse wuz dat it didn’t really matter. As fun as dat wuz sometimes I really felt like I wuz largely wasting muh ma fuckin tyme dere, even fo' those 4 hrs I actually wuz working. Think o' “Time” by Pink Floyd an' dat wuz fine ass much muh ma fuckin life. Thinking back now, da bomb job I ever had wuz pumping gas at uh marina during summers back in high skoo. Sadly at 27 I don’t th'o't I could git away wiff dat any mo'. If I could though, I’d be back dere in uh heartbeat. Sun, water, bikini’s, da smell o' 4 bone gas, colt 45 fo' tip’s…if only I could incorporate some o' dat into muh ma fuckin job taday. Imagine da possibilities…..
So I’ve rambled on fo' long enough an' in uh few hours I gots ta catch uh flight ta Germany. Am I half done or only half started here? In da end who cares. With da 50% mark fast approaching I can honestly say dat dis here past year has been one o' da funnest, most interesting years o' muh ma fuckin life…next ta ’96 o' course but that’s uh story fo' another tyme. what 'chew thinking man?
Sunday, October 29, 2006
Sunday, October 22, 2006
Rounding Second
I’ve come to the conclusion that the Swiss people have a better appreciation of time than the rest of the world. No doubt the sheer number of clocks they are surrounded by on a daily basis plays a part in this, but it must be more. The world here seems to move at its own pace. Not necessarily slower because procrastination and running late don’t seem to be traits of the people here, just steadier. If you’re driving in the country and there is traffic for no logical reason (like a cow in the road, or a tractor broken down..which I see on a nearly daily basis), the smart money would be on the fact that a Swiss driver is at the head of the line. It’s almost as of the people here expect everyone else to run by their schedules, they do make all the watches after all.
I’ve found it to be a rather nice change. I wasn’t typically late for things before, but I was known to miss a flight or two, and my driving has definitely slowed down a bit. Perhaps the 55hp car and speeding tickets play a part in that though. Of course predictability can be good and bad but thus far the clockwork Swiss lifestyle has been pretty decent. I don’t wear a watch, which over here is comparable to walking around naked. But really what’s the point, between computers, cell phones, iPods it’s a redundant piece of equipment. However despite the predictable, clockwork like lifestyle time still seems to be speeding up. Possibly even exponentially but I wont bore anyone with that nerdy theory.
Next Wednesday marks 1 year living overseas. I can’t believe it, my colleagues and friends can’t believe it, my wallet doesn’t believe it…but despite logic seeming to say otherwise, the calendar doesn’t lie. Hell, it was only last month that I graduated from high school, last week I finished college and only yesterday that I moved over here wasn’t it? It’s incredible for me to think that it was actually nearly 10 years ago that I finished high school, nearly 6 years ago that I finished college and as of next Wed, 1 year since I moved over here. Where the hell does the time go!
I started here a year ago with a laundry list of expectations, things to do, places to see, friends to make, girls to date, cars to buy etc. As you can probably imagine reality was much different, not good or bad, just different. Over the past year I’ve done and seen quite allot and despite the ups and downs the overall experience has definitely been well worth it. I was so miserable at my job before leaving that I truly can’t imagine what I’d be doing now if I hadn’t jumped ship from Detroit. My position here is has been great so far, I actually feel like I contribute something to the organization, after all filling the ketchup dispensers is an important job! I’ve even got a few other companies here that have asked me to consider changing jobs.
I almost hate to admit it but there were some days while working back in Detroit that I would leave at noon..just take my cellphone and go home, go to the bar, go hang out at the pool (thanks kovax’s’s’s), lunch on 8 mile, go drive my cars…anything but work. What made it worse was that it didn’t really matter. As fun as that was sometimes I really felt like I was largely wasting my time there, even for those 4 hrs I actually was working. Think of “Time” by Pink Floyd and that was pretty much my life. Thinking back now, the best job I ever had was pumping gas at a marina during summers back in high school. Sadly at 27 I don’t think I could get away with that any more. If I could though, I’d be back there in a heartbeat. Sun, water, bikini’s, the smell of 4 dollar gas, beer for tip’s…if only I could incorporate some of that into my job today. Imagine the possibilities…..
So I’ve rambled on for long enough and in a few hours I have to catch a flight to Germany. Am I half done or only half started here? In the end who cares. With the 50% mark fast approaching I can honestly say that this past year has been one of the funnest, most interesting years of my life…next to ’96 of course but that’s a story for another time.
I’ve found it to be a rather nice change. I wasn’t typically late for things before, but I was known to miss a flight or two, and my driving has definitely slowed down a bit. Perhaps the 55hp car and speeding tickets play a part in that though. Of course predictability can be good and bad but thus far the clockwork Swiss lifestyle has been pretty decent. I don’t wear a watch, which over here is comparable to walking around naked. But really what’s the point, between computers, cell phones, iPods it’s a redundant piece of equipment. However despite the predictable, clockwork like lifestyle time still seems to be speeding up. Possibly even exponentially but I wont bore anyone with that nerdy theory.
Next Wednesday marks 1 year living overseas. I can’t believe it, my colleagues and friends can’t believe it, my wallet doesn’t believe it…but despite logic seeming to say otherwise, the calendar doesn’t lie. Hell, it was only last month that I graduated from high school, last week I finished college and only yesterday that I moved over here wasn’t it? It’s incredible for me to think that it was actually nearly 10 years ago that I finished high school, nearly 6 years ago that I finished college and as of next Wed, 1 year since I moved over here. Where the hell does the time go!
I started here a year ago with a laundry list of expectations, things to do, places to see, friends to make, girls to date, cars to buy etc. As you can probably imagine reality was much different, not good or bad, just different. Over the past year I’ve done and seen quite allot and despite the ups and downs the overall experience has definitely been well worth it. I was so miserable at my job before leaving that I truly can’t imagine what I’d be doing now if I hadn’t jumped ship from Detroit. My position here is has been great so far, I actually feel like I contribute something to the organization, after all filling the ketchup dispensers is an important job! I’ve even got a few other companies here that have asked me to consider changing jobs.
I almost hate to admit it but there were some days while working back in Detroit that I would leave at noon..just take my cellphone and go home, go to the bar, go hang out at the pool (thanks kovax’s’s’s), lunch on 8 mile, go drive my cars…anything but work. What made it worse was that it didn’t really matter. As fun as that was sometimes I really felt like I was largely wasting my time there, even for those 4 hrs I actually was working. Think of “Time” by Pink Floyd and that was pretty much my life. Thinking back now, the best job I ever had was pumping gas at a marina during summers back in high school. Sadly at 27 I don’t think I could get away with that any more. If I could though, I’d be back there in a heartbeat. Sun, water, bikini’s, the smell of 4 dollar gas, beer for tip’s…if only I could incorporate some of that into my job today. Imagine the possibilities…..
So I’ve rambled on for long enough and in a few hours I have to catch a flight to Germany. Am I half done or only half started here? In the end who cares. With the 50% mark fast approaching I can honestly say that this past year has been one of the funnest, most interesting years of my life…next to ’96 of course but that’s a story for another time.
Monday, October 09, 2006
Listen to Your Mother
Despite what your mother may have told you, Never Drink and Fly. This applies not only to the flight itself but also a 12 hr (plus/minus) window before the flight.
Alright, my mother never actually told me to drink and fly. In fact she probably would've told me the exact opposite, if solicited for her opinion. But i'm searching for excuses here..can't i play the blame game.
Flashback to Sept. 29th. It's Friday afternoon and in just a few hrs, specifically 3AM, i've got to wake up and drive 2 hrs to the airport for my 7AM flight. Now consider that my boss's boss has decided to throw our whole department a little party, BBQ, swuaray, grill abend..whatever you want to call it. Great idea, bad timing. A night of free beer and fool inevitable ends the same no matter where its going on. You do your best to behave and be responsible. Half your brain, stomach and half the people at the party are constantly reminding you that you have to get up in four hrs, but inevitably that other half of your brain and that other half of the party win out.
Weak American? I'll show you a weak American!
Famous last words.
Well, you can guess the result. I woke up (somehow), drove to the airport (although i probably shouldn't have), made my flight (barely) and nearly showed the business class section what i had for dinner the night before. I said nearly...i told you i wasn't a weak American! Stupid? Perhaps, but definitely not weak.
By the second flight i was back in the zone and even managed to enjoy a few movies on the way over. Nacho Libre (or Super Nacho..as translated on the air France flight) was actually surprisingly funny. As for the second one, well I assume i enjoyed it but honestly i don't remember which movie it was.
To round off my Saturday i managed to catch a ride down to a party in Ohio where the best band in the world was rocking the suburbs. Calling it the suburbs doesn't quite do it justice as apparently Eric Clapton live in the neighborhood.
Anyway, I finally crashed around 2AM on Sunday following 6000 miles of flying, 5hrs of combined driving, countless cokes coffee's and redbulls, and even a few visits from the friendly Police.
The rest of the week was actually allot more of the same...with a bit of work thrown in for good measure (and to make things billable). I got to hang out with some work folks, see some friends i hadn't seen in a while and even beat on, i mean drive a friends new Sky Redline. Which is already for sale in case anyone's interested (Jed, that'll cost you a 5% commission).
So thanks for a good week Detroit.
Disclaimer: This trip was for work i just choose not to talk about work here...honest.
Alright, my mother never actually told me to drink and fly. In fact she probably would've told me the exact opposite, if solicited for her opinion. But i'm searching for excuses here..can't i play the blame game.
Flashback to Sept. 29th. It's Friday afternoon and in just a few hrs, specifically 3AM, i've got to wake up and drive 2 hrs to the airport for my 7AM flight. Now consider that my boss's boss has decided to throw our whole department a little party, BBQ, swuaray, grill abend..whatever you want to call it. Great idea, bad timing. A night of free beer and fool inevitable ends the same no matter where its going on. You do your best to behave and be responsible. Half your brain, stomach and half the people at the party are constantly reminding you that you have to get up in four hrs, but inevitably that other half of your brain and that other half of the party win out.
Weak American? I'll show you a weak American!
Famous last words.
Well, you can guess the result. I woke up (somehow), drove to the airport (although i probably shouldn't have), made my flight (barely) and nearly showed the business class section what i had for dinner the night before. I said nearly...i told you i wasn't a weak American! Stupid? Perhaps, but definitely not weak.
By the second flight i was back in the zone and even managed to enjoy a few movies on the way over. Nacho Libre (or Super Nacho..as translated on the air France flight) was actually surprisingly funny. As for the second one, well I assume i enjoyed it but honestly i don't remember which movie it was.
To round off my Saturday i managed to catch a ride down to a party in Ohio where the best band in the world was rocking the suburbs. Calling it the suburbs doesn't quite do it justice as apparently Eric Clapton live in the neighborhood.
Anyway, I finally crashed around 2AM on Sunday following 6000 miles of flying, 5hrs of combined driving, countless cokes coffee's and redbulls, and even a few visits from the friendly Police.
The rest of the week was actually allot more of the same...with a bit of work thrown in for good measure (and to make things billable). I got to hang out with some work folks, see some friends i hadn't seen in a while and even beat on, i mean drive a friends new Sky Redline. Which is already for sale in case anyone's interested (Jed, that'll cost you a 5% commission).
So thanks for a good week Detroit.
Disclaimer: This trip was for work i just choose not to talk about work here...honest.
Thursday, September 28, 2006
And the winner is...?
Rennen. I suppose it was predictable, but in case there was any doubt i went to the race last weekend. The weather was perfect for racing and despite the high ticket cost it was well worth it. I was actually rather impressed at the variety of vehicles that showed up including some really cool classic bikes. Europe is earning my respect more and more....at least on the car front. I went up with a friend from work and his family so it certainly wasn't as much of a party as Oktoberfest would've been, but his kid can pound some serious beers! Who would've known a four year old could drink so much.
But now its back to the states. Saturday morning i have to get up at 5 to head to the airport and catch a flight to Detroit. Good timing too, i need some new versatile solutions for modern living and the catalogues on the plane are just the place to find such priceless items. Radio's for the shower? Check. Rollable tie machines? Check. Combination laptop stand and tote bag? Check. How I've made it this far is beyond me.
My only complaint with this trip?...i have to go back through Paris. Damnit. I hope my bags make it since i plan on smuggling large amounts of contraband.
Just kidding..?
Despite the shopping opportunities, this trip actually comes at a bit of a bad time since i should be getting ready to move to my new apartment. The Liechtenstein police (thats singular by the way..i think there's one cop in this country) will kick me out at the end of October. Something about to many tickets and to much loud rock and roll. Their loss i say!
Actually i was only able to get a 1 year living permit so now i must move to Switzerland. Truthfully, I'm looking forward to it. Not only do i get a bigger apartment, but its in the middle of a much bigger town. It should be allot funner. Because my current town has absolutely no nightlife, anything would be an improvement.
But now its back to the states. Saturday morning i have to get up at 5 to head to the airport and catch a flight to Detroit. Good timing too, i need some new versatile solutions for modern living and the catalogues on the plane are just the place to find such priceless items. Radio's for the shower? Check. Rollable tie machines? Check. Combination laptop stand and tote bag? Check. How I've made it this far is beyond me.
My only complaint with this trip?...i have to go back through Paris. Damnit. I hope my bags make it since i plan on smuggling large amounts of contraband.
Just kidding..?
Despite the shopping opportunities, this trip actually comes at a bit of a bad time since i should be getting ready to move to my new apartment. The Liechtenstein police (thats singular by the way..i think there's one cop in this country) will kick me out at the end of October. Something about to many tickets and to much loud rock and roll. Their loss i say!
Actually i was only able to get a 1 year living permit so now i must move to Switzerland. Truthfully, I'm looking forward to it. Not only do i get a bigger apartment, but its in the middle of a much bigger town. It should be allot funner. Because my current town has absolutely no nightlife, anything would be an improvement.
Wednesday, September 20, 2006
The Big 27
No one can embarrass a child quite like their parents. Whether it's a little spit in the hand to fix that wayward lock of hair, the pants jiggle while school shopping or the jacket with your name inside it, parents seem to find endless ammunition to supply a child's friends with. Luckily as we grow up these things tend to become less embarrassing and much easier to ignore. Every once in a while though, parents still seem to come up with something to remind their children that they're out there, especially on Birthday's.
Today is my Birthday....
NOTE: this pause is to allow you time to click on over and write me a mail saying happy birthday or better yet..send me a gift. I like my corvette's in velocity red please. Black is a suitable alternative too.
Back so soon? Anyway, today is my birthday and I'm reminded of a birthday a few years back in which my Mom managed to embarrass me from over 500 miles away, truly an impressive feat for any parent. I was working in Memphis at the time and as usual i was doing my best to forget the fact that it was indeed my birthday. Another year older with nothing of substance to show for it...my cynical side showing there.
So I'm sitting at my desk and from out of nowhere one of the dudes who worked up on the phone lines comes back and says “Is it your birthday?”
Me “Um, Yeah. How did you know?”
Dude “well your mom just sent a mail to the company inbox telling everyone up front that its your birthday and we should all come back and wish you happy birthday”
Me “Great. Thanks” don't shoot the messenger...don't shoot the messenger.
Looking back now i realize that it was not meant to embarrass me, but at the time i was embarrassed as hell. Ahh but time passes and we get older. Nowadays i get the option of embarrassing myself for my birthday.
I bring this up only to highlight an interesting tradition here in Europe. Here, whenever anyone has a birthday they bring all sorts of food and eats into work and send an announcement to the company list. “come on over and eat my food, help me celebrate my birthday”....something to that extent anyway. I just couldn't bring myself to do that though. It feels a bit pretentious to me. When i told the people here that the tradition in America is the opposite...people buy YOU things for your Birthday, they thought it was just as odd. It probably didn't help when i told them a Rolex was a typical gift.
For everyone that sent me Birthday wishes, thanks! For everyone that didn't and were only going to send after reading this and being reminded...well, i know who you are and i have a long memory.
What was i talking about again? Ahh yes, to drink or not to drink, that, my friends, is the question. It's September and that means Oktoberfest is upon us. I know, doesn't make sense to me either but the Germans don't seem to notice a problem so why bring it up.
Oktoberfest is underway and although i didn't reserve a seat anywhere i got invited to go up this weekend for a few days of, well, drinking. The only problem is there's also a classic rally going on here in Switzerland. It's actually a pretty tough decision. Sure i can drink anytime, but not in 1 liter quantities in a tent with 500 other drunk people. And sure i can see races any time, but this one is only run every four years.
http://www.klausenrennen.com/en/Geschichte/geschichte2.htm
My plan of action is basically to procrastinate until as late as possible and then make a decision.
Will i go to the race?
Will i go to Oktoberfest?
Tune in next week to see the exciting conclusion of “The Weekend of Sept. 23”.
Today is my Birthday....
NOTE: this pause is to allow you time to click on over and write me a mail saying happy birthday or better yet..send me a gift. I like my corvette's in velocity red please. Black is a suitable alternative too.
Back so soon? Anyway, today is my birthday and I'm reminded of a birthday a few years back in which my Mom managed to embarrass me from over 500 miles away, truly an impressive feat for any parent. I was working in Memphis at the time and as usual i was doing my best to forget the fact that it was indeed my birthday. Another year older with nothing of substance to show for it...my cynical side showing there.
So I'm sitting at my desk and from out of nowhere one of the dudes who worked up on the phone lines comes back and says “Is it your birthday?”
Me “Um, Yeah. How did you know?”
Dude “well your mom just sent a mail to the company inbox telling everyone up front that its your birthday and we should all come back and wish you happy birthday”
Me “Great. Thanks” don't shoot the messenger...don't shoot the messenger.
Looking back now i realize that it was not meant to embarrass me, but at the time i was embarrassed as hell. Ahh but time passes and we get older. Nowadays i get the option of embarrassing myself for my birthday.
I bring this up only to highlight an interesting tradition here in Europe. Here, whenever anyone has a birthday they bring all sorts of food and eats into work and send an announcement to the company list. “come on over and eat my food, help me celebrate my birthday”....something to that extent anyway. I just couldn't bring myself to do that though. It feels a bit pretentious to me. When i told the people here that the tradition in America is the opposite...people buy YOU things for your Birthday, they thought it was just as odd. It probably didn't help when i told them a Rolex was a typical gift.
For everyone that sent me Birthday wishes, thanks! For everyone that didn't and were only going to send after reading this and being reminded...well, i know who you are and i have a long memory.
What was i talking about again? Ahh yes, to drink or not to drink, that, my friends, is the question. It's September and that means Oktoberfest is upon us. I know, doesn't make sense to me either but the Germans don't seem to notice a problem so why bring it up.
Oktoberfest is underway and although i didn't reserve a seat anywhere i got invited to go up this weekend for a few days of, well, drinking. The only problem is there's also a classic rally going on here in Switzerland. It's actually a pretty tough decision. Sure i can drink anytime, but not in 1 liter quantities in a tent with 500 other drunk people. And sure i can see races any time, but this one is only run every four years.
http://www.klausenrennen.com/en/Geschichte/geschichte2.htm
My plan of action is basically to procrastinate until as late as possible and then make a decision.
Will i go to the race?
Will i go to Oktoberfest?
Tune in next week to see the exciting conclusion of “The Weekend of Sept. 23”.
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